Owl and Raccoon – Bones

Another prompt courtesy of Madison Woods. Follow the link to see the picture. Also make sure you participate. It’s a great writing workout.

Something snapped under Owl’s foot.

Chewed, gnawed, cracked open, sucked out, crushed and bleached bones formed a thick blanket between the edge of the forest and the growing foothills.

“Where are we now?” he asked.

“Must’ve taken a wrong turn,” Raccoon said, looking around.

Owl grimaced and Raccoon shrugged.

The sun inched lower, half hidden behind the pine trees. They walked toward it, stepping on skulls and shins, crooked fingers hooking at their shoelaces. A thin dust kicked up, settled down in their mouths and eyes.

They reached the forest. Behind them, an ogre stood up and stretched himself awake.

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38 thoughts on “Owl and Raccoon – Bones

  1. Challenge met! I agree with the others, brilliant description of the bone-littered landscape. I’m now gonna make a couple of little suggestions:
    “Where are we now,” he said” to “Where are we now?” he asked.
    and “The sun inched lower, half hid the pine trees” to The sun inched lower, half hiding the pine trees
    Minor stuff but, I think, improving the flow and aligning the tenses.
    Otherwise, really top writing and storytelling. We all love the owl and the raccoon!

    1. Thanks Carlos,

      I think I forgot “behind” for the sun one. But yeah, agree with the other attribution. Going to fix it now.

      Thanks for the read and pointers.

  2. I like this. I’m not as articulate at expressing my enjoyment as others, but I thought it was neat. :)

  3. You already know that I love Owl and Racoon, Craig! I’m still trying to decide if they are human or animal, I tend to prefer the latter, but now I know they have shoelaces I may have to admit that the former is more likely.

    There are some gorgeous lines here (the shoelaces one especially) and a very vivid description of the area they are walking through.

    I got a bit muddled on which direction they were walking – “between the edge of the forest ant [sic. presumably, and] the growing foothills” kind of suggested they were leaving the forest and heading towards the hills, rather than the other way around.

    But Owl and Raccoon can do no wrong for me, and the sight of the waking ogre at the end was just perfect!

    1. Hey Elmo,

      I’m still undecided too – but I think they are going to be anthropomorphic animals. Or humans with animal features or you know, what I have no idea. hahahhah.

      The way I pictured it – they were between the forest and the foothills, some kind of valley, but I just woke up when I wrote it, so I might not have been thinking clearly.

      Thanks for the read (and catching that spelling mistake.)

  4. Yes, I like the way that just lumber along through whatever is in their path. The ogre will be a surprise, but I am sure they will figure out some joke to play on it. Perhaps you should somehow get the confrontation into the next prompt…
    yours,

    Lindaura

  5. If this is going to be a children’s read, what a wicked and macabre pair of characters! I’m loving it. Like the others, I particular enjoyed the crooked finger bones snaring shoestrings.

    1. Well, Owl and Raccoon aren’t necessarily wicked or macabre, but they seem to find themselves in that kind of setting, is what I meant.

  6. A great story Craig.
    I loved the gruesome description of the area, especially, “Chewed, gnawed, cracked open, sucked out, crushed and bleached bones formed a thick blanket between the edge of the forest and the growing foothills.”
    Then the realisation at the end that the two friends had had a narrow escape.
    Thanks for a great read.

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